The real is illusion – The illusion is real




Escape from the Matrix




The author: Who is “OWK”? I have no idea. Sometimes he is here. Then he is gone again. He is using the body of the writer like a channel. And if he does not write, the writer is a “very normal man”, with human feelings, dreams and fears. Also, he mostly enjoys this a lot. To write about what he is ”doing right now” does not really make sense, since every day is different and new.

This is especially the case since this 7. December 1998, when he was in a small, hectic café in an Indian city, and was allowed to have this one spiritual experience that others before have described as “enlightenment”.

Yet does this entity “OWK” who has been writing this book still exist at all?

Or has this book been written by itself, like a channel? Like the dream that finally is dreamt by itself, without needing a dreamer. Like the creation that does not need a creator. In some way like this the book itself is the author and named itself “OWK”..








      The story of the dream


      Enlightenment and Truth


      How much is enlightenment, and is awakening cheaper?

      What is Enlightenment?

      The Moment of Enlightenment

      Appendix to the “Facts of the Truth“

      Life as a cosmic theatre

      The evolution of truth

      Relative Truths

      The return into duality

      “Knowing Comes“ Wisdom in the place of Knowledge

      Freedom means, the search is over

      The “Enlightenment-Shock“, solitude

      Can we become enlightened by another way?

      Enlightenment as a process

      Enlightened ones causing mutual confusion

      Life as an Enlightened Being

      Enlightenment, and then what?

      The Transformation

      The naked facts of Transformation

      Life in Truth

      The Comparison to “normal people“

      The State of Being of an Enlightened one

      ...And the dramatic ending (the death of the enlightened being)

      The trap of Not-doing

      Mind, Ego and Emotions of an enlightened one

      Smalltalk with Joe Doe

      The fear of Shiva

      Can (and should) everyone be enlightened?

      The empty mirror

      The black mirror

      The “unauthentic enlightened one“

      The intoxication of the energy-goddess

      The Magic of the Enlightened one: The Way “Wonders“ work

      Love and Bliss

      What you give up front comes back from the behind

      When two enlightened beings meet

      Might they have Sex?

      “Monogamous, polygam, or no relationship at all?“

      Differences between enlightened ones

      Differences in expression

      No comparison is possible

      Different paths

      The reason that not everybody talks about it

      Why we are naming it anyways

      Can one recognize enlightened ones?

      The “new enlightened one“ - no more Guru airs

      Direct Satsang


      The “psychological enlightenment“

      The experience of awakening

      An “enlightened one“ can go on sleeping

      Friendships are often destroyed

      Awakening from Maya and Enlightening Leela

      Comparison of “awakened“ and “enlightened“

      Related spiritual experiences

      What do we mean with “state“?

      The Nothing, the Void, Soonyata



      Samadhi, Meditation

      Death, Karma, Reincarnation

      Heaven, Hell, Purgatory

      The incarnated, individual Soul

      The Tao, Yin and Yang

      “Pretty good“ Kundalini-experience

      The tantric tradition

      The two “I´s“, God and Goddess

      God or Goddess, conscious or subconscious? Good and Bad

      The sound “OM“

      Table of Master- states


      1. Surviving is everything

      2. Sex is everything

      3. Long live free will

      4. Love is everything

      5. Truth is everything

      6. God is everything

      7. I am (is) everything


      Enlightenment from a neurological perspective

      Neutralization of spirituality - Awakening sleeping parts of the brain

      New tasks for the brain - (Chakras are located in the brain)

      Integration of enlightened parts of the brain

      God as a Psychologist

      Left- and right hemisphere in the state of enlightenment

      The phenomenon “Human-Being”

      What is the “EGO“?

      What is the mind?

      The “constructed mind“

      The imitating, tricky mind.

      “Gender-war“ - The war of man and woman

      “I want to be loved“

      “Truth“, the world from a spiritual perspective

      Nothing is true

      ..and everything is true

      “God and Existence“

      ..Or: Energy and consciousness

      Duality and Non-duality

      Sun- and Moon-consciousness

      The Moon-position: A speculative “proof“ of God

      Separation of light- and sound waves

      The cosmic super data bank

      The Trinity of God

      Time phenomenon’s and other dimensions

      The “here and now“ (Yang)

      Flowing on time line (Yin)

      The stretched time of eternity


      How to deal with (unpleasant) emotions and fears

      “Imagine your own death“

      Swimming in the ocean, blissfulness

      Enlarged looking-perception

      Enlarged Listening-perception


      Turn around the thinking compulsion

      Taking in Earth-energy

      Human evolution; a short form of the process of liberation

      1. Hypnoses

      2. Search

      3. Capitulation

      4. The God realization

      5. The Escape

      6. Freedom from God

      7. Back into the matrix, beyond enlightenment


      After finishing the Book


      About the book

      The final truth

      The absolute and highest truth

      My Vision



by Antariou (Berlin)


Dear Owk,

Or hello to the God within us all,


The great game that God is playing with him/herself is truly wonderful.

When God is meeting himself and is pleased about the name “Owk“ and looks at the picture of him, which has been taken by Kiya in India, he is so pleased to again see the same picture within Antariou, just to notice how good it fits to the name Owk.

It is a special pleasure these days, now that “it“ wants me to invite people just to share this exquisite, vibrating energy. What a gift to itself!

And “it“ is writing a book and will be delighted in another body whilst reading it. There is so much energy, that all usual shapes start to dissolve, diving into each other, and “it“ is asking “itself“ to write a preface. What a joy!

The first thought that comes into appearance is that the preface will write itself whilst meeting today.

The second: I remember reading the book. Andrea could not always follow the written words, yet she could feel a lot of peace and silence and this also comes along with what this book is about.

The next: Should I write this into the preface?


And now: Is the preface already written? Is this already the beginning of writing?

I can’t keep myself in front of the computer any longer; all shapes are starting to dissolve. The energy is amazing. The trees are calling me.


So long, and thank you for this moment.

Owk is here. I can feel him. Vibrating.




The story of the dream

I have dreamt something – a beautiful, nice dream.

Yet shortly before waking up, one of the lovely dream-figures became hysterical.

All of a sudden she had this terrible fear of dying. She told me that I must not wake up, for otherwise she would die. She got mad.

Die? My dream-figure? Suddenly she believes she exists? That she is identified with herself?

What to do?

Normally, I would just think she is nuts and simply wake up, that she is crazy indeed! But she caught me. I began to explain, that it is just a dream – my dream – and that this is nonsense. She started to cry.

What to do?

After all, in the dream I had loved her and I remembered the feeling.

I didn’t want to hurt her. Unexpectedly I again forgot that it was just a dream.

I was as nuts as she, identified with my dream-body.

We were sitting together, full of fear of waking up. And I forgot that only I can wake up.

But nature does follow certain paths and moves on. Too long I had been sleeping, and again I crossed the edge towards waking up. And again she acted as if she were crazy.

Well then, I had to “heal“ her. All dream-figures are normal and don’t bother about dream dying. But she surely was psychotic.

So, I called a lot of therapists in order to make a normal functioning dream-figure out of her again. I did all that was possible. Also a lot of “breathing” because of my emotions.

Take this foolish identity away from her!

I trusted the therapists. And again I could not wake up. “First she has to be healed, since I love all of you so much…”

I told somebody that I wanted to wake up, and that it is so paradoxical. All of a sudden they were all coming over to me, wanting to heal me.

There were the therapists; they wanted to make a normal functioning dream-figure out of me.

Then there were the idiots who believed I should be just working, getting children, etc. They were to ignore. They said, if the dream is “good”, then I will have a “better wake up” somewhere else. I didn’t get that.

Then, there were the philosophers; they started to think about whether it is a dream now or not. And does life after waking up exist? And can one allow me to wake up?

Some had cults, religions, and were convinced that if I just strongly believed the words uttered by somebody long ago, then I would surely wake up very nicely. Yet, if I do not believe it, after waking up I will immediately have to fall asleep again and have to dream on, yet I will look different.

Others reckoned I should forget that it is “my dream”.  No, it is somebody else’s dream; that person should be called “God”; and if I do not believe this, I will wake up in a terrifying place. I told them, “I can only wake up where I fell asleep, can’t I”? Yet with them communication failed.  Like robots, they repeated the same lines over and over. After a while I ignored them.

And the scientists! They were eager to precisely examine the laws that underlie this dream world . Like it is true for most dreams, visual things were peculiar.

All the time they questioned “Why? Why?”. I have created my dream for me and they wanted to knock it down into all single components.

Sometimes I saw that lunatics were coming – yes, all of a sudden all were so crazy- who meant to help me. “Teachers”, they called themselves. They thought they “knew”, how to wake me up. I should be doing funny postures with my body! they named it yoga or tai chi. Then I surely will wake up!

And others supposed that before waking up, my dream-body had to be totally “healthy”, so they stitched needles into me. They told me in order to wake up, one needs the right “balance”; otherwise it won’t work. And without a strong “Hara”, no waking up anyway.

I believed them and started to practice and practice. Some times, nature was stronger. Another time, since my real body was already well rested, I was about to awake. I was able to see through this madness and stopped all the exercises.

Yet, shortly before, others came and caught my attention. They asserted that they were awake. They called themselves “enlightened”. And a lot of others believed them. They came to me and said: “There is nothing to do, simply surrender to your dream”.

They said that I should continue dreaming, but consciously, knowing that it is just a dream.

They said that they were “awake”. I did not exactly understand. Awake? From MY dream? I felt jumbled. Those were the ones that confused me!

Were they visitors from another dream? Were they part of my dream or separate? And again my head nearly split and I could not wake up. This riddle had to be solved.

My real body started to rebel; I could feel it even “through” my dream-body. It started to vibrate, and the ones that call themselves the “tantrics” told me I should simply enjoy all. Chakras, kundalini, energy and so on. Yet, they were better than the ones that simply guessed I was nervous.

Well, I could indeed manage to simply connect my dream-body with my real body. “True yoga” indeed, hour-long bliss and orgasms. The dream reached a new quality. Independent from the outside, it was from the dream itself.

But what to do?

As time passed by, all were gone again and I was left alone. Alone with my bliss, connected with my real body.

Once prophets came and thought to be able to look into my dream-future. They meant to know when I was going to wake up, when all were going to wake up.

Totally mingled people.

I have called all these people insane but didn’t recognize my own insanity, since I believed that I was separate from them. That is the way that I – through them – valued myself and identified myself.

And forgot that it was just a dream.

And forgot who I  really am.

All were making me so mad that I myself got crazy, not knowing anymore what there is after waking up. Now there was fear of the total unknown.

I knew it was a dream. But if it’s not “real”, how should I enjoy it? Would I be captured within the dream, within the illusion, forever?

What should I do as a dream-resident?

All of a sudden others were coming and started to “believe” me. That I am “awakened”. They greatly misunderstood me and wanted to “know” how to “wake up”. From MY dream? Perverse.

Danger! They might call me “enlightened” and I can neither dream on in peace, nor wake up?!

Should I now in my dream start running around, telling them that I am only dreaming? Totally nuts!

Once more identified with this personality I am in the dream? Playing the “master”? And all of a sudden believing that others are able to wake up from my dream? What for?

What to do?

Where does this mania come from, that I first have to convince everybody that it is only a dream in order to enable myself to “come back home” again? The illusion of having a “task”, a “mission” in the dream? What bullshit!

How long can such a dream last? Did this dream exist even before me? Will it continue after the total awakening?

And: Am I not already totally awake?


I have dreamt something. A beautiful, nice dream.

Yet: Shortly before waking up, one of the lovely dream-figures became hysterical.

I must have been crazy


Enlightenment and Truth

“Enlightenment“, what does that mean? What does somebody mean by “Satori“, or by “Samadhi“? Are there any differences? Why do some speak about the “here and now“ and others talk about “timelessness“? What did Buddha mean when he talked of “Nirvana“, what did Jesus mean when he said “Heaven“? Is there God, Heaven and Hell, Angel or Devil? Are there other dimensions? What is the matrix?

Some are telling you “you are all that“; others reveal, “you are illusion“; again some say “I am”, and this is all there is“; others make it known “I am not“.

Is there one path, or have we all reached our goal a long time ago? Is the path the goal or is the path the obstacle? “Pure consciousness“ or “pure energy“? Or is everything anyway just nonsense?

Chi? Kundalini? Prana? Chakras? Yin or Yang? Duality or oneness, as well as, or neither nor? Soul-Body-Ghost? Super soul? Cosmic consciousness?

Drug experiences, tantra, sexual energy, pure love, or is it all only superego? Conditioning or mass-hypnoses? Churches, sects or psycho-cults?

Jesus speaks about charity and the “father in heaven“. Buddha talks about compassion and transmigration of souls, re-incarnation, Nirvana and the void. Lao Tze mentions the unchangeable Tao, which takes care of itself.

Osho speaks about “existence“ and sexual energy, Mohammed about the sword and Moses about the 10 commandments.

Did they all have the same experiences or are there “different types of enlightenment“?

All these questions have been keeping mankind busy ever since.

I will try to answer these questions out of my knowledge as best as I can. I am familiar with various experiences of awakening, and the state of “experiencing oneness with God“, the “Nothing“ (Void, Nirvana), Satoris, Samadhis, awakening of the Chakras, Kundalini energy, including the encounter “union of Shiva and Shakti“. I have experienced being “the watcher“, the “non-doer“.  I have been “pure love“ and “pure awareness“ as well as “pure energy“.

I myself do not like to use the word “enlightenment“, since this word is connected with so many different expectations, projections and the imaginations of all people. So please, forget all what you already know, or think you know about enlightenment. Put it all aside. I am not that.


And over all I would love to offer a phrase of Lao Tze:

“The truth which can be spoken can not be the complete truth.“

Same as with this book, which is just a part of the “cosmic game“ and therefore can never be the complete answer. Yet, let us see where this part leads us...


How much is enlightenment, and is awakening cheaper?

The “good news“ is that both are for free and available.

In fact spiritual enlightenment is a “gift of God“. Therefore it is not possible to “make it happen“.

And, it is just not possible “to buy“ it or gain it through the “grace of a master“.

So relax, you cannot force it.

Theoretically, if some “enlightened Masters“ do indeed make such promises, they are either charlatans or they just do not know the difference between “awakening“ and “enlightenment“.

On the other hand, the state of “awakening“ can truly be influenced, can really happen just through the presence of other awakened beings.

Therefore, it can happen to you that through a gathering of some awakened people (Satsang) all of a sudden you “awake“.

Altogether, the “enlightened“ as well as the “awakened“ are both able to help us gain awakening, but they cannot help us to become enlightened.

“Awakening“ can happen by just sitting together with one or more awakened or enlightened beings.

Usually the enlightened person will not take any money, though if he/she is very famous there could be an entrance fee. After all, most of the enlightened ones have to earn a living too. So they often sell their words or their presence and there is nothing wrong with that.(*smile*)


However, one cannot sell a spiritual experience. I cannot promise you the experience of “awakening“ just because you pay me. It is just not possible.

Furthermore, the awakening of another person is such a great gift, the greatest gift at all! If somebody awakes through the presence of an enlightened one in a “one to one sitting“, for example, the enlightened one should pay the “newcomer“. Since this is such a beautiful experience, such a gift, it should not be the other way around.  Never. For the enlightened person it is one of the greatest blisses on earth, so at least it should be for free.


Another thing, in case you are learning a “technique“ in order to awake, I would like to make you aware that you probably will miss “it“.

The “doing“ of a technique is in contradiction to the experience of awakening.

One should focus on “non doing“ at first hand.

At this point I have to mention that I do not want to be unjust to people who are still offering ways and practices. Altogether, there are useful ways and teachings for a variety of benefits, like for self-awareness, relaxation, self-realization, healing or just for the fun of it.

This can help you a lot to reach beautiful states, yes indeed, but for “reaching“ the state of enlightenment – sorry, no.

What is Enlightenment?

There are so many experiences that feel like “enlightenment“, and so many contradictions as well as so many different “enlightened ones“.

Many people compare their own experience to those described in books and the talks of some old masters, a Guru or Buddha, and realize happily: “Yes! This is it!“

Many times I myself thought, “Now this is it, now I am enlightened“. Having reached wonderful states or blissful experiences, I often thought “this must be it“ or “now I really must be enlightened.“ (*smile*)

Often this is our human “tricky mind“ that wishes to believe what “mind“ wants to believe, wants to see what “mind“ wants to see and of course wants to read what “mind“ wants to read. So relax, there is nothing wrong with that.


But what is enlightenment?

Now it is time to jump into the dangerous zone of trying to describe what enlightenment is.

What is enlightenment really?

One thing for sure, it is so much easier to describe what it is not, like Buddha: “No, this is not it”.


And all of a sudden I am standing in front of the same problem as everybody else who is trying to express “it“.

The best thing to start with is the utterance of Lao Tze:

The truth which can be spoken can’t be the absolute truth.

Sounds good, mmh...


Now let us be serious and truthful: it is something, which cannot be understood by the human “mind“. Furthermore, and/or the other way round, it is something which one can only “understand“ without the “mind“. One can only “see“ it if the “mind“ is out of the way.

Imagine: In a state of “a total switch off“ of the “I“, something is going to be experienced.

Afterwards, when the “I“ is back (plugged in again), it is trying to understand this “something“ which has just happened. This “I“ is trying to explain it according to its own understanding, its past, its spiritual conditioning..

And often it is only the mind that thinks that it has authentically understood what this is. Therefore, there are great misunderstandings.


Honestly, one has to admit that one does not understand it.

The “mind“ is not able to understand it, and never will be. (*smile*)

Therefore, it is just not possible to communicate it.

This is due to the fact that “communication“ is part of the whole game and one part is not able to grasp the “complete thing“.

DURING enlightenment one entirely tastes completeness. (First definition *smile*) Back to the “I“, or “switched on“ again, one is only “a part of it“ trying to communicate it to another “part of it“.

So how should that work?

No knowledge is there, because there is nobody there who knows anything.

To say “I only know that I do not know“ comes close to the truth, yet this again is knowledge and therefore a contradiction.

Entanglement in oppositions is a logic paradox. Why?

As a result “it“ is a contradiction, a paradox, and beyond duality. The world of duality dissolves into this truth, into this completeness.

The world of duality dissolves (another definition), therefore there are all these contradictions.

So what is happening with the “logic mind“ when confronted with total contradiction? Of course, “mind“ turns off.

When I tasted the ultimate oneness or completeness, my mind got switched off. This was how I experienced it.

It was not like I experienced it because of a result of the “shut down“ of the mind.  It was the other way round. Through the “logic-shock of the truth“ my mind got switched off on the spot.

It was similar to a computer that stops functioning through a logical paradox like 1 + 1 not only results in 2, but at the same time in 3 as well.

This simultaneousness creates the end of duality, the wholeness, and the paradox..

Of course the “mind“ is able to accept contradictions, yet only one behind the other.

Once Yin, once Yang, once full with love, then with hate, once calm, another time hectic and so on...

One relative “truth“ follows the next one. This is what everybody is experiencing in normal daily life.

This is no problem for our mind. We are used to it.

In the “state of enlightenment“, however, everything at the same time is true.

All states of consciousness exist coincidentally, everything is true and untrue at the same time.

Everything seems real and seems to be just an illusion, a dream, all at the same time.

It is like simultaneously experiencing “I am all and everything“ as well as “I am not existing at all“, or “I only exist in the here and now“ as well as “in the never-ending time“.

I have been existing “since the beginning of time and will never stop to exist“ hence “I only exist now“ in this single existing moment of the here and now, because “this moment is everything which exists and does not exist at all“.

“I am a dream“ and “there is nobody who dreams“, “the dream is dreamt by itself“ and “this dream does not exist“.  All this at the same time and still so much more and still so much less.

The words “simultaneously“ or “coincidentally“ or “at the same time“ are not perfectly well chosen, because in this state time does not exist at all.

But which words to choose?

This is the tragedy with using words. (My dear reader this is a big task for you, this is something you have to read with your heart rather than your mind.)

So our “normal time“ does not exist and we experience timelessness at speed zero, and again at the same time (*smile*) everything seems eternal and never-ending.

Everything which has ever happened and everything which is going to happen does exist in the here and now and nothing ever happened before this or after this so called now.

This is not very easy to take for a human “mind“ and as a result our computer switches off.

And one should explain this? One’s own “mind“ was not able to follow it and now this “mind“ wants to explain it to other “minds“?

This is a very confusing and risky task.  Therefore, some people decided (consciously or subconsciously) to just focus on one side of it and present half of the truth since it is so much easier to be understood and appreciated then.

Others are in the so-called “Shiva-Space“, where one is able to “see the illusion“.

This means that this “space“ belongs to the sixth Chakra, the third eye. Therefore, some people see that all the others are already enlightened and that they just act as if they are not.

And so they look into other people’s eyes and lovingly call it “being in truth“ or “Satsang“ and utter things like “just relax, you are already enlightened“ and “there is nothing you have to know“, or “just stop thinking that you only have to find out who you are because the one and only truth is “I am“.

(This “I am“ is true, but it will not lead the other person to have the experience. *smile*)

The experience of true “enlightenment” will happen by itself when the time is ripe for that.

And there is nothing in the world which could force it or make it happen, not even Satsang.

Indeed, Satsang can lead you through “inner development“ and can give you “inner peace“, meditation, blissful feelings, understanding (for the mind *smile*).  It can definitely help you “recondition your ego“, can guide you to lead an authentic life, a life honest to yourself, ..Satsang can help you in a variety of things; furthermore, it can lead you to some beautiful spiritual experiences...but enlightenment? Sorry no!

Most of the enlightened ones had their experience alone, without a master, just when time was ripe for it.

Buddha, Jesus, Lao Tze, Osho, just to mention a few. Their aim was to “create“ a better world, a far more loving, more peaceful and more truthful world.

Their teachings of love and peace, compassion and truth were not there to “make you become enlightened“, but for your development, your growth into a loving life worthy to live.

After this introduction into the difficulty of speaking about enlightenment, I would like to describe the experience as realistically as possible.

Therefore, what follows is a list that includes all the elements of this unspeakable experience.

Of course, others might have found different realizations and explanations while tasting the same experience. We are all individuals and perceive slightly different things while realizing the same truth.

Some documents describe the experience of enlightenment as the end of your old life, like dying, and at the same time the beginning of a new state of being.

I go with that statement.

The experience is like a new beginning, yet it never ends. Therefore, the rest of one’s life will be a permanent experience of “experiencing“.

“After enlightenment“ one has to go back into normal duality, but very different of course. This duality is filled with a complete new way of sensory perception and “truthful experiences“.

It is a life in the here and now, perceiving the truth of the now which is relative and underlies time.

It is not an ultimate experience. No, it is something that goes on and on. (Dear me, how can I ever finish this book? *smile*)

The Moment of Enlightenment

Now I would like you to dive with me into the absolute moment, into my experience of “it“.

Firstly, please be aware, that all this is happening at the same time and not one thing after the other. The sequence is at random and I am going to treat it simply as a list of some facts:


·         The most important thing is at first hand: The absolute ultimate, final and true realization that this is enlightenment. The end and nothing will follow afterwards; it is part of the experience and hard to discuss. You cannot understand it nor prove it.

·         My experience does include the final Kundalini-event, where energy comes up the front side of the body (open heart center) as well as up the spine.

It feels like never-ending eternal bliss. This is happening by itself and you cannot force it or suppress it. The energy shoots up and you cannot help it. One can only surrender to it, do nothing, relax into it. (On the contrary, all my doing has always gotten in the way and prevented it from happening.)

·         Finally, the energy dwells on top of the head and is sensed as total eternal blissfulness. And it stays on and on before it leaves the body, going upwards.

Afterwards comes the return into the “normal condition“, “cold showers“ that are followed by a great peace and thankfulness (to whomever, whatsoever).

·         Also “afterwards“ there is just wondering, the big surprise that having just experienced “the end“, and I am still alive! It does not seem necessary to live on. I have had everything already. Filled with peace and thankfulness. Everything is fulfilled.

There is only wondering.

This “dying“ feels so eternally blissful that I am astounded: I am still alive!

And on top of that, I am still in my physical body.

·         The total “switch off“ of the “mind“ means that the usual condition of understanding and thinking does not exist anymore.

·         The usual perception of the “subjective I“ does not exist.

·         The surprise is  that “I“, although dead or “switched off“, still exist.

·         This is followed by the realization that neither death nor birth exists.

I observe: I have always existed and I always will exist. I have never been born and I have never been dead. I was actually dying whilst being born.

·         Realization: What I thought was me, is not me! What I thought was me was just illusion!

·         Unification with God: “I am God“ (and of course also the Goddess!), the consciousness of God. It feels as if God is always enlightened, and always in reach. We humans just have to stop holding on to our individual consciousnesses, empty them, make space for God and let the melting happen. ( Yoga does mean “Union with God“. In Tantra the term is“Mahamudra“, or “cosmic orgasm“, or “melting into existence“.)

·         Realization: I am all that. I am everything! The whole universe and everything that exists and does not exist.

·         The universe is God’s dream, my dream. I am the dreamer.

·         Outside this dream nothing does exist. There is nobody who is dreaming. The dream is dreamt by “itself“, not even by a God. The dream is God (paradox).

·         The void “beyond the dream“ is felt.  (“Nirvana“, Non-existence)

·         God as a Woman: The dream as an individual, intelligent, moving awareness in form of the overall physical universe (“Existence“) is sensed as female.

·         God as a Man: Observing the universe silently, awareness out of the void (“Non-existence“) that does not influence “Existence“ is sensed as male.

·         Therefore, one could say : Not only is “Nirvana“ (non-existence, the void)  conscious, but also the universe (existence).  Both – each for itself – have their own consciousness.

They cannot directly influence each other. (This cannot work because the “nothing“ cannot exist in the “something“ and the “something“ does dissolve into the space of the “nothing“)

Nirvana is sensed as male and “Existence“ is sensed as female. During the experience of enlightenment, both unify like a cosmic wedding. Both become one, the ultimate oneness, therefore both “step out of time and space“, beyond “Existence and Non-existence“. The unity of “All and Nothing“. No more, no less. Both are “the same“.

One could also say that during the unification of existence and non-existence both-in-one are in a wavy, unmanifested shape, the “eventual existence“.

From a “temporal/physical“ perspective one is in a state as if one were in front of and shortly after the existence of the universe. Like in the transitional period between the birth and the death of the universe. (Am I being confusing?)

·         Everything is pure consciousness. I am pure consciousness.

·         Everything is pure energy. I am pure energy.

·         My individual spirit dissolves and unifies with God.

·         I have always been enlightened, I just did not know it. (Better, I just was not aware of it!)

·         Pure energy is my true self.

·         Energy and consciousness are coming together – unification – becoming one.

·         There is only ONE “I“. And this one existing “I“ is in all of us.

Everything is true and not true.

This does mean that everything that has ever been believed by the mind has the possibility of happening; it has substance, and can become true within the illusion of the dream. The dream modifies according to the beliefs and non- beliefs of the mind.

And at the same time one discovers the illusion, and all that has ever been “believed” or “known” by the “mind” lies in front of one as an illusion. (*smile*)

So it becomes clear that there is “nothing“ and that “all what is“ is just part of the “mind-illusion“ (Maya).

All logical concepts of the mind, all duality or “either-or beliefs“ and concepts temporarily pass by. Thereby does one realize a higher overall divine logic, explainable instead with “as well as“ connected with simultaneous “neither nor“.

·         There is not only one God, there is only God and nothing else. All is (in) God.

·         God is “this one soul“. I am “this one soul“. Outside this, nothing exists. There is no individual soul. Every “I“ is one and the same “I“. There is no “you“, there is no “other“. I am in all the others.

·         Death does not exist. There is only one soul and this one will never die.

The perception of and the belief in an individual soul is an illusion. The “individual I“ is dying with death. Yet it continues existing in a sort of “I am“ perception within the particular one soul.

·         In connection with that comes the experience of “I am not existing“ and within this “non-existing“ comes the realization of the paradox that I am still existing in this “nothing“. Thus, in the way that the “nothing“ (the void, nirvana) is consisting of “something“, it has substance. This is one of the biggest paradoxes. Buddha was talking about it as well. It is truly hard to understand for the human mind.

The individual “I“ has never existed at all, only in our imagination!

·         The shock that comes afterwards is: “I am this!“, “I am something special!“ “I have always known!“, as well as “everybody is!, everybody is the same!, there is only God!“

·         The feeling that everybody else is me as well. Everybody else is God as well. Everybody is enlightened. They just act as if they do not know. Like children playing on a playground.

·         The feeling that this is a joke, God is a joker, I am a joker, everybody is a joker.

This is all a cosmic joke!

·         Afterwards (plugged in again), feeling jolly, endlessly merry about this joke.

The joke is that I took myself seriously, that “I thought I was real“.

·         Followed by the realization that “nothing is serious“, everything is just a “game of consciousness“. Like God is playing with himself. (Hard to take if one is thinking about all the cruelty on earth.  But God is the good as well as the bad and neither/nor.  More of that later on in the book).

·         The realization that “I have never done anything“.  I was never the one “who was doing something“. This “doing“ is illusion. We all are in a theatre where the actors have forgotten that they just play a role. And all of a sudden they take it seriously, or even as if their lives were threatened!

·         Deep respect for the “not knowing“. The mind got “switched off“.  Nobody is there anymore. Nobody is there who “knows something“ and because of that, knowledge does not exist either. All knowledge is discovered as illusion.

·         Connection with the realization that everything can change and nothing is stable.
The only lasting thing is “the nothing“ itself;  everything else is not constant.

“There is nothing one could know.“

·         Realization that the only thing that keeps one from realizing oneself is being identified with oneself. Identification does avoid the experience of tasting “this one soul.“

·         Realization that the original idea of the “ego“ is misunderstood. Of course without identification, life on earth is not possible, so the principal idea is “good“.

“Ego“ does mean being identified with one’s own “life-drama“, with one’s knowledge or lake of knowledge. This forms the pattern of our normal behavior.

Through enlightenment all patterns drop. And one is more authentic, more honest, a more truthful being.  Able to drop all the masks, there is no need to hide anymore.  One is allowed to just play within this “theatre“. (*smile*)

·         The realization that all knowledge is human and has nothing to do with God.

God owns a kind of “higher knowledge“ and a “higher plan“ that we cannot grasp with our “thinking mind“. Our mind is made for a different reason, just for very very basic things.

By discovering this, one is free. One does not have to worry about the “pseudo-knowledge“ of mankind. It is not real.  Consciously or subconsciously, it is just “part of the search for oneself“.

·         All is like in a movie, or in the middle of a play. (I met somebody who had experienced the encounter of enlightenment and afterwards she was walking around eating popcorn just to enjoy the show.) The world turns into a cinema and this is for free!

·         Enlightenment seems to be the easiest, most natural, and most normal thing on earth. One wonders that the all other people act as if it were serious. Why don’t they just stop and feel “it“. Everybody is “it“. I can see God in everybody.

(Here comes the “desire to help“, to help them stop their “life-dramas“, to help them stop their suffering. But this does not seem to be God’s will. This game, the search itself, inclusive of the suffering or the pleasure of life, all this is part of “it“, the undivided.)

·         Outside duality, within God’s consciousness, all is perfect, everything is “right“ and simultaneously senseless, since nothing ever happens anyway. The end of the universe is now, as well as the beginning.

·         Everything has a “higher purpose“. God, Existence, or the Universe - however you wish to call “it“- is perfect AND is eager for evolution to become even more perfect! Is this paradox hard to take in? The universe is already 100% perfect and in the next moment it again is 100% perfect, but somehow “more perfect.“

However, there is no growth as if to say from 99% to 100%, or from 100% to 101%. It is not like that.

·         The universe is like a river of energy but unmanifested and timeless. On the other hand it is manifested and always in the best possible manner according to higher divine intelligence. It is at the same time in “the nothing“ and in the “something“, whatever is the best opportunity, now. (Oh God, this is so hard to express!)

·         About time: Time stops and only this one moment exists. Nothing ever happened before nor is it going to happen afterwards. Only this moment exists. God exists only in the now. The language of the Universe is the present. Everything else is created by the mind.

·         On the other hand there is the sense of stretching into time, like a wave, as if I exist only “now“ AND also in “all times“. Since the beginning and until the end. Yet, there was no beginning and there is no end. It is not as if everything that ever has been and everything that will be cumulates in the here and now. It is more like the feeling of totally stepping out of the usual time dimension. Not even a here and now exists. This is better: “All here and NOW’s“ which have ever existed and will ever be are sensed at the same time.

·         Just imagine you are all of this, all substance, all energy, all God consciousness. Time as a “restriction“ sinks into insignificance and disappears. God is all and everything. Therefore so is time and everything that exists. Everything that does exist is me: “I am all this“. We are all manifestations that have ever been and that will ever appear in the future.

·         Realizing this made my experience absolutely true and complete for me.

·         I did not only taste the experience of the “here and now“ – I love to call this Yang-consciousness – which is only ONE manifestation of God (the here and now).

In my understanding, the final experience also contains the “Yin-enlightenment“, which is the perception of God as being a non-manifested “wave“ in which all manifestations are contained. Thus, outside of duality of course, in this experience everything at the same time is true. There are no contradictions anymore. There cannot be.

·         The “logic of God“ is not “neither-nor“. It is “as well as“, which is beyond duality and our way of thinking.

·         I have experienced a lot of “Satoris“ and “Samadhis“ “afterwards“.

This “Satoris“ are single events and feel very true, yet they are still dual. Here I would love to point out that I distinguish between “Satori“ and “Samadhi“ (see chapter later on). Both, in my understanding, are not the final experience.

Another definition: Enlightenment is Satori and Samadhi happening at the same time. “The big merge“ is what others used to name it. Names like “Mahamudra“, “cosmic wedding“, “cosmic orgasm“, “Shiva and Shakti meet inside“ (and “melt outside“), “God and the Goddess come to be one“, “Yin and Yang are melting into one another“, “inside and outside change into one“, or “the creator and the creation become one“. .All these words just aim to describe “it“. Also I use them as I have no others.

The one I truly like is “the dreamer and the dream become one and I am all of that“.

·         One of the biggest paradoxes: Everything has its higher purpose, a higher reason, and the cause for all that is happening lies in the future. Comparable to a magnet that attracts iron. In our usual way of thinking, the cause of the result lies in the past. In God’s consciousness the cause lies in the future.

·         And at the same time, nothing has a “higher purpose“, all is relative and “senseless“. It is just God playing with himself. All is happening only “now“, without any plan and no aim.

·         There is a higher reason, and there is no higher reason at all. This is simultaneously true (and untrue).

·         Again it is “God’s logic“.  It is always both!  Both and at the same time!  Everything is true and untrue. You will never find something true without being untrue. Never.

Duality does not exist within God. This “system“ only exists in the dream world of humans.

·         The realization that the so-called subconscious is in “true reality“ the “consciousness of God“. An “individual consciousness“ does not exist in reality. It only exists in God’s game of the illusion of an individual self.

Therefore one can make peace with the subconscious. Now one is able to stop forcing oneself to be and/or act consciously all the time. (*smile*)

Appendix to the “Facts of the Truth“

Finally, I dare to utter that as long as there is a “you“, as long as something “outside of you“ does exist, now and manifested, then you must not name it “enlightenment“. As long as there are objects existing outside of you, whether alive or dead, whether persons or  stones, then don’t speak about enlightenment. As long as there is a yesterday and a tomorrow that is beyond the now, don’t speak about the “here & now“.

Nowadays, the state of the “here & now“ often gets mixed up with enlightenment.

Some people think that just being in the “here & now“ is enlightenment.

Only if the “here & now“ as well as the “yesterday and the tomorrow“ are existing simultaneously will one experience it.

As long as your perception only embraces “I am“ without acknowledging the “I am not“, or the other way round, as long as you think “I am not“ and “I am all that“ is missing, then please be aware that you are still captured within duality. All these states are beautiful encounters, yet one should not immediately call them enlightenment.

This is against the absolute truth and only creates misunderstandings.

Again and again mystic masters tried to explain it. Yet in duality one can only describe things one at a time, therefore it is so easy to just focus on half of the truth, thinking that this is it.

All states and experiences are beautiful. No state is “higher“ or more important than another. Nothing is more worthy, nothing is less worthy.

Finally, I have to admit (my Body-Mind-Ego-Complex has to admit *:) that I am not enlightened!!! At the same time I am. Just as much as everybody else!

Life as a cosmic theatre

It seems as if God or Existence is writing a “life-drama“, producing an empty body, then playing the role by himself… or herself.

As part of the game, one has to forget that it is just a game. And it is far more interesting if the game seems to be real. Otherwise it would be boring, wouldn’t it?

To me it seems as if there are ready-made roles, and people take over a role and get identified with it.

This can be any kind of role, and applies to relationships, professions (science, art, politics), as well as being a spiritual teacher.

Take for example this book.  This book has to come into existence, this is sure. Yet it does not matter who writes it! It’s just that somebody is needed who fits into the role of writing this book and has the skills to do so. The life of the author was just there to create this book. His “life story“ is not important. And this applies not only in case the book is successful, but also if it is not. It just does not matter.

This is a reversal of the law of cause and effect. The book is not the result of the life of the author. The author got this life to serve the book.


Normally, an enlightened person does not have to play a role anymore. In case of teaching hundreds of disciples, a “master“ has to take on this role. And usually he is aware of this role. He knows that it is just a role. The same applies to me while writing this book. I take over the role of an author. The roles are stable. They have to be “filled“ by a person. If a person “leaves a role“ somebody else has to fill it. I am sure you know this from relationships. After breaking up, at least one of the two starts a new relationship. And after a while the new relationship looks like the old one:  same pleasures, same problems, same compromises.

The same applies within a job. After you quit, another person will take over the same job. So, the role in the “game of life“ just got a new actor.

Still the role stays the same.

It is like in a theatre where some actors fit into certain roles, some do not. Then they change roles and see if it fits better. This is how the theatre of life is functioning. We often change our “roles“. As always, God gives us new possibilities according to our experiences. If God can “use“ us better, he will do so. We cannot escape. (*smile*)

I am afraid that I have to admit that this also applies within sad dramas.

If one does experience great suffering, it is often the manifestation of ones fears. Therefore, to make the play complete, often another person is involved and “has to play the bad guy“. Otherwise it would not work.

Often painful experiences and life-dramas repeat themselves, happening again and again until they are fully and totally experienced and integrated. Then the person can get free of this role. But as long as one has not totally and consciously experienced the (dramatic) situation,  one has to play the role.

If one becomes aware of the pattern or manner of the “play“, then the role can be dropped. Somebody else will fill it instead. Often a relationship ends when somebody realizes a certain pattern or makes one step forward. Then the partners do not fit together, do not match any longer. And the partner who does not make this one step forward will soon find a new partner who fits into the game. Only if both together are realizing the pattern or role they are playing, only then is it possible to continue the relationship. Soon afterwards both will experience a new “relationship play“, since the old roles were experienced, integrated and transformed.

For “fully awakened“ persons, the “play“ does not exist anymore. They only slip into it sometimes, when they briefly play a role for a certain benefit or reason. Soon it will slip away again. This can be very difficult for others, since for them we fulfill all their expectations at the beginning, and then all of a sudden we are gone like a bubble. It is truly hard for us to make long-term commitments.

If we are being together with other people and experience being in the here and now with them, then it is beautiful. When we dive into a state of love and happiness, all roles are gone. We just are, not this or that, just human, just here with you.

Being free means playing no role anymore. It is being identified neither with a role nor an identity. Once we are free, we often go back into the bathing cabin and come back on stage as a “master“ or “guru“ or whatever. Many enlightened ones refuse to play the role of a “master“. They just watch the world from outside. You won’t recognize them, hence they can be anywhere and anybody. Actually, they are not really present, they just watch and continue playing. Yet they are “God as a watcher“ and not “God as an actor“. God is watching himself whilst playing theatre and he is not allowed draw attention to himself, or cough..

If enlightened ones “return to the stage“ as a master or guru, they often talk about all sorts of esoteric nonsense, like me. They do so just to give the game a new direction or new dynamic, which supports the evolution of mankind. And a lot of people love it and support the play. They love coming to gatherings, or satsangs, or to read books about enlightenment.(*smile*)

(I met Shakespeare in eternity.  He is crying because nobody understood what he wanted to show us by inventing his modern theatre.)

By the way, from the perspective of a “watcher“, all roles seem to be “trips“. God plays them all within a human body anyway. God is playing the roles totally consciously, next to the consciousness of the human.

Experiencing or perceiving a role as a “trip“ does not mean that we have to get rid of it. If we see it that way, as something we have to get rid of, or something we should “avoid“, then we make a judgment. By being judgmental we are still trapped within duality, since there is something that “should not exist“.

To see it in that way, I am just on a “book writing trip“..

The evolution of truth

As I already mentioned, I see the universe as something perfect, but which is still developing into even greater perfection. Evolution takes place. This does not mean that it is not perfect as it is now!

The same applies to truth. If one does experience “the moment of enlightenment“ one sees the absolute truth. Yet if “it“ happens “next time“, the truth seems even more truthful.

Now how to explain this one? The absolute truth is of course always the same great truth. It is only our ability to assimilate the experience, to interpret and understand it, that changes and develops. It is just that the way we are able to take it in ripens.

Relative Truths

Earlier I tried to describe the “experience of enlightenment“ and share it with you. I tried to express the unspeakable. To make the mind understand the absolute truth, the best explanation is that there is no “absolute truth.“

And this comes close to the truth, yet it is still not totally true. (Because this statement would also be an absolute truth, and the proof of the opposite. Please be aware, that God would not be almighty if there were an absolute truth! God would have to hold on to it then. He/ She would not be free, and creativity would vanish.)

Since this absence of absolute truth comes close to the truth, it is the best trial that “mind” can undertake in order to “understand“ the truth that cannot be understood.

Now, there are enlightened ones walking on earth telling you the truth. And these often are “relative truths“. This means that it is absolutely true JUST NOW.

In the time of the realization that “there is just this moment“, everything else is fiction.

All the “relative truths“ are true, yes, but only just in the here & now.  In the “next moment“ they can be gone. Therefore if one is listening to an enlightened, master one should be aware that the words that may be spoken soon won’t be true anymore. So please, don’t be pissed off.  They do not lie to you!

For the enlightened one this is never a problem, because he/she does live in the here & now.  Always.

But for the usual mind this of course does cause troubles and great contradictions.

Well I recommend that you simply “turn it off“. (*smile*)

The return into duality

To make it clear for all times: The moment we enlightened ones start taking over a position or utter something in a clear and understandable manner, we are totally back within duality. Otherwise it would just not be possible to communicate. With whom? Nobody is there. No “other” does exist.

Sometimes we are “pure Yin“, sometimes “pure yang“, sometimes both, sometimes neither/nor, and all we know deep inside is that we cannot control it, that it is not in our hands.

“Knowing Comes“ Wisdom in the place of Knowledge

In certain moments when only the “normal mind“ gets in action, we experience a totally “different mind“ than before. It seems that enlightenment also “changes the mind“. One experiences being a pure channel full of knowledge, knowledge that comes from out of the void. Of course I do not mean knowledge in terms of school-knowledge or something one could learn from a book. This knowledge is far more complex. Therefore I prefer to call it “wisdom“. This wisdom is like a river that comes and goes out of the nothing. One could also describe it as “knowing comes.“

This “knowing“ can be anything. Anything about the truth or about the truth of the moment. Nothing else is writing this book! The book grows out of the nothing. I am talking about knowledge, that is not stored anywhere, which just comes into existence in this moment. In the next moment it is gone again.

Exactly this is a specialty of an “enlightened brain“.

Freedom means, the search is over

One could also define enlightenment as “the search is over“.

Whatever one was looking for, whatever one wanted to know, is over and is answered. Mission fulfilled. The “riddle of ones individual life“ is answered.

Even if the answer is “there is no answer“, it is an answer. If fully experienced, this can be a satisfying answer!

Ones “life-search“ can have different reasons and aims. For one it is the search for himself and his life’s purpose. For another it is the search for God, which will lead to realization. For a third it means just finding an authentic expression for ones own life, which for example could be obtained through creative artwork. By experiencing the absolute truth, all searching is over.

The “Enlightenment-Shock“, solitude

In contrast to “awakening“, where one experiences only an extreme “high“ like blissfulness  or heart-opening states, “spiritual enlightenment“ has  a “side-effect“, the so-called “enlightenment-shock“.

Most of the enlightened ones have to draw back from the outer world after having experienced “it“. This is because for a long time one is unable to communicate with others. Therefore one feels closer to animals or plants or in the best-case little children.

We find the reason for this in the realization of the illusion, the realization that “nothing is real“. This does not only apply to our unwanted conditioning, it also applies to things we love! Truly everything is illusion. Considering this, I am asking you now what is more “painful“ for you – experiencing true suffering or experiencing true love? You decide for yourself. As you can see, the opposite of a truth is always true as well (Plato).


I am convinced that love is surely “the highest“. The whole Universe is love. And surely love is the most beautiful state on earth. The most beautiful way to connect with our dear fellows.

Yet in the absolute truth there is just “nothing“. Nothing is “there“ anymore, nothing is left. Indeed, nothing IS left. The other, the “you“, disappears and does not exist anymore.

Through awakening the ego vanishes, truth, enlightenment, the whole “I“ disappears, as well as the “you“.

What’s left is love for everything, without any differences or preferences. It cannot be only and just for one person. Relationships are somehow becoming something senseless, something unreal.

This “shock“ can last a lifetime. Therefore an enlightened one might move into the mountains, into a cave or somewhere lonesome. But it does not have to last a lifetime. Soon one can have fun again within the illusion. More fun than ever.

Can we become enlightened by another way?

Through my experience and knowledge and through the observation of other “free ones“, I clearly have to answer this with YES.

Sometimes in this book I critically mention “pseudo-enlightened-ones“ or make strong statements about how the experience should be if it is a complete experience.

At this point, and also to avoid misunderstandings, I have to declare that others who have had different “enlightenment experiences“ can also be enlightened. Of course they can!

We all are “normal persons“, “normal seekers“ until one personal encounter with truth  happens to us.

This can appear as it does in my description, or it can be perceived in a slightly or totally different way.

Often a simple Satori will do, or a deep “no-mind-state“, and one “jumps into the truth“. Or some even find themselves being enlightened after an authentic perception of the “no-thing“.

Others just experience “psychological enlightenment“ without “spiritual experience“. Nevertheless, these also seem to be enlightened. Often they are able to give statements about “the relative truth of the moment“, and can help others to “awake“ (See a chapter later on in the book).

Therefore the way the transformation occurs does not seem to be important. What matters is that the “ego“ as such is recognized as a self-created illusion. Masks are dropped, the mind becomes the “slave and friend“ (to the extent that mind will ever be used again (*smile*). There is love for oneself, for God, for the whole creation, and one finally starts living!, honestly and authentic to oneself...just to name a few examples.

After an experience of “enlightenment“ some still hold on to a “spiritual trip“, others will just move on, or make a career, or a million dollars. This is all individual and is not really important.


One thing that might create a difference is the way if  we communicate the experience to others, and how we do it. How do we utter the truth that we have got to know, and do we do it at all? If all enlightened ones were just leading a simple life without speaking, they would all be similar, all equal, and it would not matter “which sort of enlightenment they had experienced“ or which branch they were coming from. (*smile*)

On the other hand it can happen that one is sure about having experienced the encounter with enlightenment and yet it is not true. It can be that what he had experienced was actually just a particular spiritual experience. In this case it is better to keep it for oneself, instead of confusing others. There are a lot of beautiful spiritual experiences that support transformation and transcendence. A person can become totally transformed and this is something one can truly enjoy and live.

(This means that if somebody, after an “out-of-body-experience“, transforms into a loving being eager to share his love, he has developed trust in existence and is welcome to share his experience. But be careful, this is not enlightenment!


Well, we are all enlightened anyway.  It is just that some “know“ (which means some have experienced it and are consciously aware of it) and some do not.

If I call myself an “enlightened one“ it is the same blasphemy. Maybe all the others are more able to develop love and compassion than I am.

Please note that when I was talking about the experience of enlightenment, I described the experience that was the transforming force leading to it. I did not speak about the state afterwards. (not until now*)

Often “enlightened ones“ are “normal“ people, and likewise often “normal“ people are “enlightened ones“.

Enlightenment as a process

Recently, I spoke with an “awakened“ person who told me that in her experience there was no special moment where she could say, “yes this is it“!

In her case the transformation happened slowly, stretching throughout weeks and months.

This is also possible and true. Often there are certain moments of “opening“, of awakening and falling asleep again.

Sometimes it is as if the process of enlightenment gets started via the experience of enlightenment. Sometimes an enlightened one has to “die again and again“.

Year after year. Will it ever stop?

Enlightened ones causing mutual confusion.

Also this can happen.

The truth of the moment perceived by one enlightened person can be contrary to the truth of the moment of another enlightened person and therefore can turn the “mind-engine“ back on again, or spawn doubts about one’s own experience.

As a result of this, doubts about the truth is can follow.

This can also happen if an enlightened one is telling about his experience and about the truth.

Speaking itself is still an act of a “present mind“, and therefore it still can be imprinted by projections (as a “subconscious play of consciousness“).

It can easily happen that one is projecting the truth of the moment into the outside world. If this happens one should be aware that this is a relative truth, a truth of the moment, which is always paradoxical, as is oneself. The experience of enlightenment is an individual one. As a matter of fact, the “sleeping parts“ within a person are different parts for everyone. Awakening this great variety of “sleeping parts“ can cause individual, subjective perceptions and experiences.


So, dear fellow enlightened ones, don’t let confusion happen. Not through others, and especially not through their satsang; not from bibles, friends, family;  not through me and especially not through yourself.

All is ok. Don’t compare yesterday’s truth with the truth of tomorrow.

But the cosmic joke goes on and on.


About the book

The book comes to an end. It would have never come into existence without using my mind. I made use of my (mind’s) conditioning.

The book could have been only a poem.

How long can a poem be?

Whole chapters could have been said in one sentence.

The whole truth expressed on a single piece of paper.

In one sentence.

In one word

In silence

An empty book.

Would you have bought it?

The mind wants to “know”.

I gave it.

From mind to mind.

Valuable and valueless at the same time.

The final truth

I have tried to explain the “enlightenment trip”. A psychological phenomenon, an accident, yet also a gift. Generally nothing else then seeing one’s own “trips in a conscious manner”. The trip itself is the “interpretation”. Many have reported it, religions arose, new trips. Maybe I could help with explaining it?

All is true. And yet finally in the end everything is nonsense.

All this was a dream.

The mind that “dreams to be awake”.

That looks towards the world outside, and projects itself.

Like onto an empty surface

Onto empty humans

Magical force

That can change, forcing the creation of the behavior that “mind” wishes to see

That sees itself in the other

As a “realization” of the projection

Calls this “I in all others” God

Calls himself God

And displays his own devil

Enlightenment as an opening into the land of the unconscious

What was collected is now emptied


What’s left?

Beyond it?

Beyond the dream?



If it could would finally leave us alone…

Returning our freedom

Are we ripe for that?


If God would finally leave me alone…

Am I ripe for it?


I do not want to be God again; I want to give back freedom to all humans. The freedom of all my projections.


I wish to see the world like it is.

The absolute and highest truth

My Vision

Now, that the book is coming to an end, all “visions, dreams and illusions” are slowly drifting away again. Therefore, “quickly a few more words”:

I dream about a world full of enlightened ones, full of love and happiness. About a world where we share what is there. A world where we all are a big, big family.

I personally dream about a “tantric ashram”, where people exchange love, happiness and energy. Where wounds can be healed. Where everybody is welcomed to give, according to whatever he is able to give; and take whatever he is able to take.

I dream about not dreaming anymore.

I dream about life.

I dream.